“You can’t have ecstasy without agony,” said the midwife to me whilst I was in the throes of transitional labour. She was trying to be encouraging, but at that stage I couldn’t see any relief in sight and I wanted to skip the agony part and get straight to the ecstasy! I realised, later, that she was right. The pain and pleasure were intimately linked and I needed to endure one to experience the other. In a similar way, the dichotomy of pain and pleasure typifies the motherhood experience.
One of the things I find interesting about mothering is that the very source of your happiness can also be a source of frustration and suffering. Motherhood is layered with complexity; it connects you with feelings and emotions that are new and raw, and these emotions seesaw continuously. Part of the problem, perhaps, lies in our expectations. We tend to think we should be enjoying motherhood all the time, particularly if it is something we have yearned for. So, we often feel guilty when we feel unhappy. (more…)
At no other stage in your life do you feel a greater respect and appreciation for your mum than when you become a mum yourself. Becoming a mum brings into focus the dedication, love and sacrifices that you’re own mum made. On this mother’s day I would like to dedicate this post to my mum – a woman who tirelessly put her children’s needs ahead of her own, and whose mothering abilities I aspire to match. It’s a post about thanks.
* The beautiful looking woman in this photo is my mum. It was was taken by my dad, at around the time she became a mum.
It’s true that no two children are the same. Behaviour, personality, and temperament ensure no two kids are alike, and you don’t need to look further than your own family for evidence of this.
Most parents of more than one child will observe their vastly different personalities. I remember when I was pregnant with my second child, a mother of two told me to expect the exact opposite of my first-born. And that prediction turned out to be accurate. In my latest article, published on Essential Kids, I explore their contrasting personalities and temperaments.
Can you relate to my experiences? Are your kids similar, or worlds apart? Do you adopt a different parenting approach for one? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Here’s a little Sunday night viewing for you. Not long ago, an article of mine ‘Adequate: the new excellent for mums’ was published on Daily Life and the next day it was discussed on Channel 9′s Today show. It has taken me three months and about 30 emails to the network to track down this footage, only to discover that the host of the show, Karl Stefanovic, got my name wrong! Click here to view the footage and see Michelle Fox’s article discussed on “Girls on the Grill.”
I am very excited to announce the winner of the Mother’s Day Elk competition.
Congratulations Rachel Armstrong!!!
Rachel, I am sorry to hear your hubby won’t be around on Mother’s Day and it will probably be ‘business as usual’ but I am sure you will enjoy spending your $150 Elk voucher. It will be posted to you shortly. Choose something that makes you happy!
A big thank you to everyone who entered the competition. It was great to receive so many entries and a variety of responses about your ideal mother’s day. Sadly, I cannot offer a prize for every blog post but I’d love you to keep the comments coming. If you read a post and it resonates with you, please ‘like’ it, ‘share’ it, or leave a comment and I will always respond. Not quite as motivating as an Elk giveaway, but I hope you will.
Rachel’s ideal mother’s day:
“As much as I love my three kiddos my ideal Mother’s Day morning would see me wake in the unusual position of having my entire bed to myself (i.e. no kids and no dogs piled on me) and I wouldn’t get out of that bed until the clock ticked over to something with a 9 in front of it. I would then enjoy a leisurely breakfast prepared by the husband and I wouldn’t have to stop eating once to get someone a drink or clean up that drink from the floor. Throw in a couple of handmade cards and interesting items purchased (with my own money of course) from the school Mother’s Day stall and I would consider that a winning day. Sadly my husband will be away on deployment with the Navy this year so I won’t get to enjoy most of that scenario, except for the handmade gifts. Although he has often bought me Elk jewellery in the past so I can probably count on an I.O.U of a gorgeous necklace and maybe even a child-free dinner when he returns home. Happy Mother’s Day!“
Is it just me or is this so called “mummy wars” subject getting tired and boring. I can’t help but think that every time an article is printed and mentions “mummy wars” that it just perpetuates the notion that mums are in battle with one another over their choices.
Yesterday this article by Alex Carlton fired up a lot of people. It paints a picture that “around the country, tertiary-educated women who grew up steeped in girl power and feminism have turned their backs on a career.” The article suggests that educated, intelligent women are ditching the boardroom in masses to stay at home and raise children in between quilting, baking and blogging. (more…)
Health & Well-being Series #1
Disappointment. It’s an emotion we all experience from time to time. It can range from slight to severe and it’s often unavoidable. If you’ve ever been in the job market for ‘some time’ you will probably have suffered the disappointment of not getting an interview, or the job itself. Sometimes our disappointment is directly linked to our greatest desires, like wanting to have our baby, or forming a lasting relationship. We often feel disappointed by the people closest to us in our lives, and sometimes we feel disappointed by people we have not even met (Lance, I am looking at you!). And as parents, we often feel it on behalf of our children – and this disappointment can be particularly hard to swallow. (more…)